How To Be VERY Popular With Cats

For the last couple of weeks, cats all over my neighborhood have been raising their heads, sniffing the air, and saying, “I smell a par-taay!” Every time I go out to get my mail, a feral cat or two from the woods behind my house is lying in my driveway. They watch me pass with a determined look on their faces. They seem to be saying, “We may be wild, but we like a good time as much as those wussies who live in houses.”

On my front porch, sitting close to my front door, house cats who have slipped away from their homes sit with expectant looks on their faces. “Dude, when does the party begin?”

All this happy expectation is due to an aroma of catnip that seeps from my house and perfumes the air. My stash of catnip bookmarks for previous books has become depleted, so I’m making more for the newest book, CAT SITTER AMONG THE PIGEONS. Believe me, that’s easier said than done. You would not believe how much time it takes to spoon catnip into thousands of little plastic bags! And catnip tends to be electrostatic. It clings to everything it touches, including me. My entire house is now peppered with microscopic flakes of catnip. I have breathed so many catnip fumes that I go around a little bit high all the time.

In my catnip giddiness, I’ve decided to send catnip bookmarks to everybody who pre-orders CAT SITTER AMONG THE PIGEONS. If you’d like one, send me a business-sized SASE (self-addressed, stamped envelope) for each bookmark you want. If you’ve pre-ordered a book as a gift, address the envelope to the recipient with a note giving your name, the recipient’s name, and their relationship to you — mother, teacher, pet sitter, sister, wife, etc. I’ll include a note with the bookmark saying something like, “Your niece Mary has pre-ordered CAT SITTER AMONG THE PIGEONS for your birthday/anniversary/Christmas. Here’s a bookmark to go with it. Enjoy!”

If you’ve ordered several books for different people, send an SASE and note for each bookmark. And, just in case I need clarification, please include your email address!

Send the SASEs to Blaize Clement, PO Box # 19324, Sarasota, FL.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s